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Living & Culture· Wellness

Why Do I Always Have To Poop When I Go Shopping At Target?

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Never anywhere else, either. Only Target. And it’s never right when I get to the store either. It always happens when my cart is half full of food that’s supposed to stay cold or when I’m waaaayyyy in the back of the store. Like God is watching me on the Target security cameras with his finger on the ‘POOP’ button, just waiting for the most inconvenient moment, giggling? I mean, how else to explain it besides divine intervention? I think it’s the world’s way of insuring I don’t spend too much money (It is Target, after all)  Is this a problem for anyone else? Or is it just me?

Why do I always have to poop when I go shopping at Target?

target makes me have to poop

I’d decided that I had pondered this question long enough, so I set out to do a little reseatch. First, I sent out a mass text message to my friends, and while I waited for them to respond I did a little googling.

target makes me poop

Ummm, yeah.

So, I’ve established that I’m not the only one who suffers from this affliction. I, too, go to Target when I’m constipated. I have not, however, pooped on the floor at Target, like that poor fellow near the bottom of the photo. Yikes, dude.

Just when I was about to fall into the deep hole of internet searching, my friends started answering.

Some people admitted it…

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I love that she just wasn’t phased.

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No shame in his game

 

Some people said it was just me

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She’s making fun of me because I don’t poop every day. THANKS KELLY.

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Actually, I think she might have that one backwards…

Some people blamed coffee.

FullSizeRender (5)

My fiancé likes to start beeping at me like a bomb when we’re out shopping and he needs to poop. The beeps get closer together as the urgency increases.  He’s a wacko.

FullSizeRender (9)

More coffee excuses…

And my Mom was just not amused

FullSizeRender (8)

So what about you guys? Does Target make you have to go? Tell me in the comments below!

target makes me have to poop
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08.05.16 35 Comments

About Kaleigh Baschal

Kaleigh Baschal is a lover of books and anything spooky. She is proficient in passing out in front of the TV, trivia, and dancing in the car like a moron for the sake of making people in other cars laugh. Kaleigh is also the Style Editor at Totally the Bomb (totallythebomb.com) and has her own awesome blog at katyroleigh.com. You can follow Kaleigh on Instagram and Twitter @katyroleigh

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Comments

  1. Shilo says

    August 6, 2016 at 7:54 am

    YESSSS.. lol and A.C. moore. Those are the only 2 places

    Reply
  2. Tracey B says

    August 18, 2016 at 4:10 pm

    Every. Damned. Time.

    Reply
  3. Lindsey says

    August 21, 2016 at 12:43 am

    Hahahaha!! Always!! I thought I was the only one!

    Reply
  4. Meeeee says

    September 4, 2016 at 1:09 am

    My husband has to poo every single time were backing out of the drive way to go somewhere!!!!! And my daughter its everytime we go to El Burrito while we are waiting for our food LOL. Haven’t had a problem with Target though.

    Reply
  5. Lauren says

    September 4, 2016 at 8:07 pm

    Omg I didn’t know I wasn’t the only one!! I could not for the life of me figure out why, when I step foot in target, I immediately had to run to the bathroom to poop. Wish I knew why.

    Reply
  6. Lauri says

    September 4, 2016 at 10:00 pm

    This happens to my bestfriend and I and marshalls and tjmaxx. I was told it is because of all of the starch they use on the clothes.

    Reply
  7. Izzy says

    September 22, 2016 at 7:39 am

    Me too! I think it’s cuz you get all excited to shop and excitement makes you have to poop lol

    Reply
  8. Michelle says

    September 22, 2016 at 2:06 pm

    Yes! I can’t even believe so many people have this experience! Target and bookstores (thankfully, I buy on Amazon more often now). Thank you for your careful research into this phenomenon!

    Reply
  9. Kyndra says

    October 14, 2016 at 6:06 am

    Ugh yes! And with a cart full of large unnecessary items and a screaming baby you won’t be put down. That makes it all more interesting. What the hell do you do with your cart while you poop? They should have a cart caddy near the bathroom just for these purposes

    Reply
  10. Falen Fricchione says

    October 16, 2016 at 7:05 pm

    Every single time I go to target! It’s like clockwork (and why I found this article when I googled it lol)

    Reply
  11. Jim says

    October 25, 2016 at 9:08 pm

    Maybe you should skip the Starbucks in the front of the store.

    Reply
  12. Sarah says

    October 26, 2016 at 5:43 pm

    I literally have to poop every time I go there, and like you – it’s never right when I arrive! Arms full of merch, other side of the store… it strikes. Now that I live in England where there are no Targets (sad face), my bowels have had to find a replacement. This now happens to me in Asda. the Walmart of the U.K. Ugh!

    Reply
  13. Isla says

    January 9, 2017 at 6:34 pm

    Yes! It’s something about the smell. What is it?!?

    Reply
  14. Amanda says

    February 9, 2017 at 9:43 pm

    Every. Single. Time!!!

    Reply
  15. Katy says

    March 4, 2017 at 6:46 pm

    ….yes. I peruse for a bit and then WHAM , the stomach cramps hit full force, usually just before heading to checkout or even in the line!
    I literally told my husband that I think I have a weird digestive allergy to Target…

    Reply
  16. Natalie says

    March 19, 2017 at 12:58 am

    Always with out fail. I thought i was along:)

    Reply
  17. Clara Sierra says

    March 19, 2017 at 4:11 pm

    Omg yes! And I don’t drink coffee. EVER! So it’s not the coffee for me.

    Reply
  18. Andrea Grimm says

    April 5, 2017 at 10:24 am

    Most retail stores items all carry an amount of formaldehyde. You know, the stuff they use to preserve dead bodies. Kinda has the same effect on products. I also have to always use the restroom when shopping in large stores. No doubt in my mind it’s our bodies reaction to the chemicals. Just my thoughts 😉

    Reply
  19. Crystal says

    April 23, 2017 at 9:11 pm

    Omg yes lol ,I don’t go in Target tho I just hurry get my stuff and leave and go home to poop . This so funny to find this and realize others share the same problem ha ha

    Reply
  20. Sarah says

    May 22, 2017 at 11:04 am

    Yes, every time. And also at other stores when I’m shopping for something for myself. I think it’s because I get excited or something. It gets things moving. Lol Btw, this blog was hilarious. Your fiancé beeps? Hilarious

    Reply
  21. RHun says

    June 3, 2017 at 9:55 am

    Omg every time!!! I’m shocked to see this post! I always thought it was because I’m so excited to shop and my body releases a chemical that makes me have to poop. Wow!!! I’m not the only one!!!

    Reply
  22. Jen says

    June 8, 2017 at 5:35 pm

    All the time! I’ve even had this issue in other STATES. I just went to Utah and had to poop when I got to target. Then, we are currently in Florida, and as soon as I went to the target in st Augustine, I had to GO…seriously someone needs to research this.

    Reply
  23. Katie says

    June 19, 2017 at 7:16 pm

    I had this exact issue today at the Dollar Tree. And every other time I’ve been there. Also Walmart. And Barnes and Noble. D= But it’s the worst at the Dollar Tree! Today I just pulled up and suddenly felt like I had taken a laxative. I googled the reason why, and it seems like one of those things that a bunch of people experience, but nobody knows why! I’m so glad I’m not alone in this issue! I haven’t ever even told anyone because I thought they’d look at me like I’m crazy!

    Reply
  24. Bailee Larson says

    June 21, 2017 at 7:24 pm

    Me and my friend text each other every time we’re pooping at Target. It’s seriously like once a week. What the heck!!???

    Reply
  25. Xander says

    June 30, 2017 at 12:16 pm

    I cannot explain it. I have to push brown every single time I’m in Target, TJ Maxx and/or Best Buy. Maybe they pump fresh oxygen into the air, this stimulating the nervous system. Or maybe its the eye stimuli on the shelves & racks. It’s perplexing. I could shat before I go to one of those 3 stores & within the first 5 mins I’m farting & within 10-15 mins I’m working one out in the bathroom. Forget fiber or laxatives…just go to Target & you’ll get cleaned out like an enema.

    Reply
  26. FancyPants says

    July 24, 2017 at 10:21 am

    I am so relieved to see that other have this issue!! I have to poop EVERY SINGLE TIME I go to tjmaxx/Marshals/Homegoods. It drives me crazy because sometimes I have limited time and sure enough I have to go poop!!! I thought it was because I “relaxed” as I peruse the isles with my Starbucks. I don’t know what it is, but I have had too many close calls where I need to go as soon as I feel the first cramp!! If I wait too long, I run the risk of a line or the slow poop walk to the bathroom. I am so glad I googled this!!

    Reply
  27. Chelsea Pugh says

    December 31, 2017 at 2:39 am

    I think it’s totally anxiety.
    The same happens to me, and also when I have people coming over for a holiday party.

    Reply
  28. Amy says

    January 8, 2018 at 9:08 pm

    Yep! And Kohl’s and Bed Bath and Beyond. Why do we get stomach cramps in these stores but not at home or work or grocery shopping?

    Reply
  29. Stephanie says

    January 19, 2018 at 7:10 pm

    Every time I get to the far corner of Hobby Lobby, I get the urge to speed walk to the other end of the store. I used to get it at hastings too when they were open.

    Reply
  30. Bonny Davenport says

    February 25, 2018 at 2:40 pm

    I too have this problem of 💩and shop!! My mom told me years ago that it was the fluorescent lights.. Supposed to have a certain pulse that stimulates our nerve centers…It happened to her when I was a child.. And it happens ti me.. Everytime. But only in big stores…gas stations or quick stops…no problem…Hope this helps.. 😁

    Reply
  31. Tina says

    March 5, 2018 at 2:53 pm

    Yep, me too. I don’t drink coffee. But almost every time I go to Target, Ross , Marshall’s, Fred Meyer, even Home Depot I have to poop. Even if I just went before I left home. I always assumed it was some form of irritable bowel syndrome, but I don’t have it any other time. Thanks for doing this important research, I can’t wait to see your results!!

    Reply
  32. Lisa says

    March 16, 2018 at 7:43 pm

    Currently googling this while at target, just after having to leave my items and run to the bathroom. Every time. Fucking insane.

    Reply
  33. jon says

    March 28, 2018 at 10:03 pm

    does anybody here think that maybe all of those products off-gassing in that large space is creating some sort of diuretic smell?

    Reply
  34. T says

    April 9, 2018 at 9:25 pm

    Lol !! Omg .. I never thought I would find this when I googled it!! Too funny! Can someone please contact Target Corp. and show them this page?!

    Reply
  35. Heather says

    February 27, 2019 at 2:45 pm

    I had this at Hallmark stores, and a few other places, now Aldi. Harbor Freight Tools affects a friend of mine the same way. Lol. Did some research, its not a chemical they use or products offered thing. It’s a Pavlovian response trigger. Just like Pavlov’s dog and bell reward experiment, you get reward there and you’ve conditioned yourself to have that reaction in order to get the reward. There was a recommendation to go back to the store again same day once or twice on a couple of occasions to break the cycle. Interesting stuff! Thought I was the only one! Lol…Enjoy Target folks!

    Reply

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1507 shares